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Creative Women (new book)

I keep getting new ideas for books. My first 3 books I wrote by myself. I have the urge now to create collaborative books. I had the idea years ago to write a collaborative book titled “Beware: They Do Shoot the Messenger.” That project is in process. I now want to create a book with stories from or about creative women who are making a difference in the world. I’ve known women who consider themselves just ordinary, and yet my perception is that they make a difference in the lives of those around them.

I created instructions for potential authors for this new book. Women can write a story about themselves, or about a woman, or women, who they want to recognize for their contribution to the world.

Click to read Instructions for Potential Authors of Creative Women.

As an example for potential authors, below is a draft of my chapter in the book.

Do I consider myself creative? I would have said no a few years ago. I have been primarily a logical, left brain, analytical thinker. I loved math and science when I was in high school. My major in college was math. My first career was as a math teacher. My second career was as a computer programmer, analyst, and manager. In 1999 I learned to write Haiku poems. My first thought when I was given the assignment to write Haiku poems was “I’m not a poet. I’m not creative in that way.

My poems are popular, and I self-published my first book of Inspirational Poems in 2012. I self-published my second volume of Inspirational Poems in 2013. I’m working on my third poetry book now.

In the mid 1980’s, a small voice inside told me I was going to write a book. My first question was “What kind of book?” It took many years to answer that question. In 2002 I started to write the book which I finally published December 2, 2014. The title of the book is Weave the Threads of Your Life: Create Your New Life.

I recently attended a one-day workshop with Michael Tertes, to discover my Super Powers. After lunch Michael worked with me to refine an identified power I have, which we chose to call Blueprint Visionary. I’ve known for many years that when I’m in a group, I naturally know where the group is headed, and how they can get there. I interviewed some of my friends before Michael’s workshop, and they confirmed that they’ve seen me do this in groups.

As Michael was questioning me about this ability, or Super Power as he calls it, he noticed that I was discounting, or taking it for granted. It comes to me so naturally, that I think nothing about it. He asked the other 17 people in the workshop if any of them do this. None of them do it in the same way I do. Is this a unique ability that I have? Is this my way of thinking ‘outside the box’ and being creative?

I discovered other super powers in Michael’s workshop. It is the unique combination of powers that fascinates me. We all have a unique combination of gifts and talents, Super Powers, that we can use to improve our lives and the lives of others.

I’m asking the question, what does society need from me now? How can I be creative and serve more people? How can I make a difference in the world?

I decided to move forward on a project that I’ve been thinking about for years. I want to find several people who would like to contribute one chapter to a book I’m calling Beware: They Do Shoot the Messenger. I was asked to give an example, to clarify my vision for this book. Below is a draft of my chapter in the book. I hope it serves as an example for others who want to participate in this project.
Click this link to read the instructions I created for potential authors: bbest.com/InstructionsPotentialBewareAuthors.pdf

One of my talents is to recognize what is beneath the surface. I seem to know what people are really feeling, and needing, even if they want to hide or deny it.

As a child this was a problem. When I spoke up, announcing that I saw or felt things that people weren’t ready to acknowledge, it caused strong emotions of fear, anger, defensiveness, and denial. I would sometimes be attacked for calling attention to the truth that people weren’t ready to acknowledge.

I began to withdraw and protect myself by not saying anything.

Years ago KellyAnn Gage offered to do a Face Reading for me. It revealed traits, talents, and challenges. She gave me suggestions on how to develop my traits to be more effective and successful. At that time I also found Richard Unger, who did hand analysis. There were similarities in what they were showing me about myself. Currently I have a friend, Sandra Edwards, who does hand analysis. She is helping me discover more about myself and where I want to focus my attention. My friend Edna Soblin, a hand writing consultant, is helping me change my hand writing in order to improve my life.

Communication is an important focus in my life. What KellyAnn told me years ago was very helpful. She said that when I’m in a group I can quickly see where the group needs and wants to go. She suggested that the group would probably not be ready to hear the message. She suggested that I not withdraw, that I find a way to stay connected until the time was right to deliver the message.

In the years since I got this advice from KellyAnn I have observed my interactions in groups. I do see quickly where the group needs and wants to go. If I speak up too quickly, at the wrong time, it causes a ‘backlash’! I have experimented with different ways of dealing with this talent I have. What has worked well is for me to identify the most influential person in the group. I work with that influential person until they understand what I quickly knew was needed. When the time is right the influential person is more effective in delivering the message, along with a step by step plan and strategy to implement.

I have not always been effective in dealing with this talent. A couple years ago I got involved with a group that offers daily phone support calls. I found it interesting that the group wanted new people to join and get their support. However, what I noticed was that the dialogue and dynamics of the group was turning off many of the new people. There was fear and criticism and judgment, poorly disguised as jokes, which was making the goal of having new people join difficult. I chose to step in and speak up. The timing was wrong, and the group began to attack me as a teacher with tendencies of hurting people by forcing them to listen. I chose to drop out of the group when I got the message that you would to be ‘stupid’ to quit. I became defensive and it felt uncomfortable for me. I did the best I could, and there were several other reasons for my not continuing. I did not feel successful with that group.

Many of us are messengers. We have a message which is valuable. Timing is critical to delivering a message that will be heard. People need to be ready. I’ve learned that it is very important to deal with my own emotional issues. My childhood memories and pain can cloud my judgment and vision. I have been doing a lot of inner cleansing in the last couple years. I intend now to claim my talents and gifts, to use them wisely, in a loving way for myself and others.

Erase the White Board

A new day, a new year, a new way of being!

What if we could erase the past, like erasing the white board that is our life?

What would our lives be like if we started the day with a ‘clean slate’?

How can we use our creativity to create the day in a way that makes us feel fully alive, fully awake?

My intention is to have an eraser in my hand. Every time I recognize that something from the past is popping up, triggering a thought or feeling, causing me upset, I am going to use that eraser to simply erase the past!

Can it be that simple? Can we stop complicating our lives? Can we choose to use the eraser in a playful, relaxed way?

My intention in 2015 is to find ways to simplify, to allow life to bring me experiences of peace, joy and love!

Will you join me?

Intentions or Resolutions?

Here we are at the beginning of a new year. Many people like to set resolutions for the new year. I find intentions more effective.

How often do we actually get results when we use resolutions? How often do we find ourselves in February or March looking back and beating ourselves up for not keeping our resolutions?

I created a new habit. Each day I start by setting my intention for the day.

What kind of intention is helpful? We could say I intend to shop for groceries or do my laundry today.

I prefer to set intentions like:

  • My intention is to respond with love and kindness in each moment today, love for myself and love for others.
  • My intention is to experience peace and joy as often as possible today, to find ways to fill my life with laughter.
  • My intention is to experience life from the abundance that comes from Spirit.
  • My intention is to follow my Inner Guidance, and allow life to attract to me the people and experiences that bring me joy.

We are all unique. What would be the most helpful intentions you could set for yourself?

Each day is a new beginning. How do you want to experience your day? How do you want to experience 2015?

Effort or Flow?

It has been a long time since I posted in this blog.

I have a new blog dedicated to my newest book: Weave the Threads of Your Life: Create Your New Life. In that blog I posted the introduction, foreword and first chapter of the book. 

Today’s topic is Effort or Flow? Have you experienced times in your life when things seem to flow with very little effort? Would you like to experience that more often? What would it take to be ‘in the flow’ more often?

I find that taking inspired action helps. We are a very action oriented society. Some actions give us the results we want; some actions create stress, and what we might call ‘negative results’. How do we know which actions are inspired, and which might take us down the ‘wrong path’ or pull us ‘off track’? I like to take a deep breath, breathing into the heart area, and allow my heart to guide me. The Institute of HeartMath has many powerful tools that we can use to listen to the heart’s intelligence.

I have been improving my connection to Spirit. There are many ways to do this. Meditation is a powerful tool. Some people think that it takes a lot of time to meditate, and I hear people say “I simply can’t stop my thoughts.” I remember doing a 21-day mediation challenge lead by davidji. I learned a lot from that experience, and from listening to davidji recently. We don’t need to stop our thoughts. We can simply allow them to come and go, watching them as if they were on a flashing marquee. The important thing is to not get stressed about them, or get hooked into a long and stressful inner dialogue with them. Using a mantra, or focusing on our breath, is helpful.

There are many powerful spiritual teachers on the planet now. Panache Desai is one of them. I participated in his recent 21-day Ultimate Energy Immersion. I agree with Panache that we need to release old pent-up emotions. Since 2008 I’ve been helping myself and others release trapped emotions, old energies that block us from experiencing joy, love, Inner Wisdom, and keep us in patterns that no longer serve us. It is wonderful to know that many tools and techniques are available now that help us heal and evolve.

We are all amazing! We are human beings, not human doings. Too much effort, the kind that is forced and stressful, actually gets in the way of our living the lives that we desire and are meant to have. I hope you find the right tool(s) that lead to flow in your life. It is a wonderful experience, and we all deserve it!

Colorful Flowers

Colorful flowers
brighten sunny winter day
joy springs from within

Lighten Up!

What do you think when I say “Lighten Up” ?

I can think of several different ways to lighten up.

It could be your attitude. You could feel lighter emotionally, experience happiness and joy, ‘lightheartedness’, laughter.

It could be weight. Many people, especially at the beginning of each new year, want to release excess weight. I prefer not to call it ‘losing weight’ and I don’t like ‘diets’ since my experience is that they don’t work for me. I have had success in releasing excess fat, increasing lean muscle, and achieving my ideal weight.

I’m going to do a section on both of these topics below. I’ll start with attitude, since that is my specialty.

Lighten Up — Attitude

Life is more fun when we ‘lighten up’ and find ways to laugh and be joyful (filled with joy).

We can find ways to see the funny side of any situation. We can make the effort to see the blessing and gift in everything that happens.

One way to do this is to ask the question “What is the blessing, the gift in this?”

Years ago I went through a program called “Keys to the Kingdom” and learned that any time things were not going the way I wanted to say the following:
“This too is good, this too is God, this too is there for me, and I demand to see the blessing!”

It is amazing how well this works. In November 2010 I tripped and hit my face hard on the cement side walk. I broke my nose and split my lip. As I was sitting in the emergency room at the hospital, with ice packs on my swollen face, I kept repeating that in my mind. It made me laugh and also started the process of finding the blessing in that awful experience.

During the next month I had many opportunities to lighten up. I found a way to forgive myself for tripping and causing myself such pain. I found a way to stop the little video in my head that was replaying the event. I found a way to stop all the ‘what ifs’ that were not going to change the event. I will not say that I am totally clear of wishing that it had never happened. I will say that people were amazed at how quickly I recovered and healed. Within 8 days I was back at my Rotary club, where people who had seen me the day after the fall were amazed that I looked almost like myself again.

So, what did I do that helped me to ‘lighten up’ after that bad fall? I focused as much as possible on what I wanted, rather than on what bad thing had happened, and what I didn’t like as the result. Before I looked in the mirror the morning after, I took my professional photo and thought “I looked like this before and I can look like this again.” As I looked in the mirror, I said “I want to see how bad it is now” and then I quickly looked at my photo and focused on looking like that again. I continued to do this, continued to focus on the goal and not on how bad it was at that time. I imagined how good it would feel to look in the mirror and see myself being pretty again.

Every day I choose to be grateful for the good in my life. Like everyone else I have times when things don’t go the way I’d like. I say or do something I wish later I hadn’t said or done. Someone says something to me that upsets me. Or someone ignores me when it matters to me that they pay attention. I keep reminding myself to look for the good and focus on that instead of the ‘bad’ things.

Lighten Up — Weight

I prefer not to talk or think about ‘losing weight.’ I prefer to say and think “I choose to be my ideal weight.” I know that being my ideal weight means better health and more energy. It means my clothes fit better and I look better.

Years ago I listened to a woman talk about her Lighten Up program (unfortunately I don’t remember her name and have not been able to find her cassette tape program — that gives you some idea how long ago I listened to it). What I remember from her program, and the parts I’ve used myself, are listed below. I have modified the steps slightly so that they work well for me.

What she suggested as the first step, and perhaps the most challenging, is to stand naked in front of a mirror and accept and appreciate our body. We often are upset about the way we look. We tend to focus on what we don’t like. She suggested that we view the body in a positive way. I have found this helps me. We can appreciate and accept the body we have. In order to make changes, it is important to first accept and love what we have. By the way this is true whether it is the body, the mind, the home, the business or career, the car, or the life we live. It seems to work the same way for everything. Once we accept and love, then we can change if we want to.

I know that the way I talk to my body is important. If I am upset and complain that my body is not supporting me, things get worse. When I am kind and gentle with my body, appreciate what I have and then focus on what I want, things get better. I have learned over the years to improve the way I talk to myself and to my body.

When I made the commitment years ago to be my ideal weight, I went into partnership with my body. I didn’t want my body to get scared that I was going to do something drastic and cause it harm. Some diets that I’ve heard people use scare me, they seem unsafe and unhealthy. I choose to release fat cells in a gentle and gradual way. I let my body know that I will do my best to take care of it, to keep it healthy. This is my responsibility. This body is the vehicle that supports me as I live my life. I want it to last and be healthy. Without our health, we have no quality of life. A healthy body gives us quality of life.

In that original Lighten Up program that I mentioned earlier, her second step was to daily spend time appreciating each part of the body. She suggested to do it either in the shower or after the shower while putting lotion on. I like to do it in the shower. She suggested doing it with the hand, not using a wash cloth or anything that gets between the skin of the hand and the body parts. For example, as I rub soap over my arm I think the thought “I appreciate my arms and hands for helping me to manipulate objects, when I dress myself, drive my car, and do my work.” I use thoughts similar to that when I rub my legs and feet. I think about my heart and internal organs, and how much I appreciate their work to keep my body alive and functioning well. I appreciate my eyes and how I see everything with love and joy. I actually improved my eye sight years ago by saying several times a day “I see clearly with love and joy.” and “I now create the life I love to look at.”

The result of the process described above is that when I am ready to eat, I allow my body to help me choose what is good for me, and how much is good for me. I remember to stop and consider “is this healthy for me, and will eating this help me achieve my ideal weight?”

I like to imagine myself being my ideal weight, having energy, looking and feeling good in my clothes. I remember to focus on what I desire, and not on the things I don’t want.